Monday, June 8, 2020


Welcome to June's Blog with Friends!! Each month a theme is chosen and then participating bloggers use the theme, to create their own unique blog posts. The blogs can contain anything the blogger wants it to, and each month a vast variety of posts are created. You never know what you will find in a BWF post; it could be a poem, a short story, a recipe, a rant, a DIY guide, or anything else under the sun. This month's theme was Poison.

The first thing that came to mind, when I read the word poison was hate. Hate is a poison, and it does terrible things to the folks who consume it into their hearts and minds. Racism is one of the most poisonous forms of hate. It needs to be eradicated once and for all. The thing that upsets me most about many of the racists I know, and have encountered, is how they hide behind the Bible and God, in trying to justify themselves, and show they are good people. There is nothing good about a racist. There is nothing racist about God.

God created us ALL, and we are ALL his children, and all he wants is for us to love EVERYONE. He never asked us to treat any certain skin color badly, or as less than, so if racists could leave God out of their bullshit, that would be wonderful. However, far be it from me to tell anyone how to live their life. In reality, I need to just worry about me, and my own eternal salvation, and worry about raising a good human being in Gigi, 

Honestly, I was going to write a long post about this subject, but I realized two things....

1. Those who will actually read my post and pay attention to it, are not going to be the ones who actually need to read it.
2. The last thing needed right now, is another privileged person with white skin, ranting about the injustices of racism. We all need to be listening to people of color right now. Listening to their words. Letting them sink in. We need to be rallying around them, and enabling them to speak. We need to be quiet. We had our turn to speak, and now it is their turn to speak, and hopefully get way more progress than we did.

So, I decided to share a post I made on my personal Facebook with y'all, and just leave it there.

This post is going to be long. I don't even know what it will say, because I'm just speaking from my heart. My thoughts. My ideas. My opinions. If you don't like it, scroll on by or unfriend me.
I was going to create this post tomorrow, on the first, because today is my Kat's seventeenth birthday. I spelled that number, so I don't feel as old, as that number is making me feel. Every year on her birthday, I spend some quiet time thinking about her. What she'd most likely look like. What she'd be doing in life. What personality would she have. Would we have a great relationship, or a rocky one, or none at all?! By seventeen, I was beating my own drum already. Today, as I kept thinking about her, and sending messages to her in Heaven, my mind kept returning to the same thought. What would her life be like in today's world?!
As most of you know, at least I think you know, Kat is biracial. In this world we live in, my heart aches, for moms of children of color. Minorities, as they're referred to, have so many struggles and obstacles. I have white privilege. All white people do, whether they want to admit it or not. Would my privilege have extended to Kat, or would it be voided by her skin tone. My guess is it'd be voided.
It is 2020 and we should have progressed much further by now, in terms of equality.
I had really planned on writing down my thoughts tomorrow, but the more I thought about, I realized she'd probably approve of me doing it today. Plus, as I wrote in a letter to someone just yesterday, had Kat lived, I would have taught her to stand for what's right, even if she were the only one standing.
God created us all. God loves us all, and told us to love each other.
People scream back at anyone who says #BlackLivesMatter, that #AllLivesMatter, but to that I reply.... All lives cannot matter, until the lives of people of color matter also.
We've seen so much blatant racism, that it's undeniable that it exists. We see cops kill human beings, and get away with it. We've seen white people committing terrible injustices to people of color. We've seen white people not participating in racist actions, but also not fighting against them. We've seen so many peaceful protests. We've seen people of color punished much more harshly for crimes, than white people who commit the same crime. If you have not been seeing it, you're not really paying much attention.
What we haven't seen much of, is change, and it's needed badly.
I see so many people condemning the rioters. That's fine. That's your reaction to our country's current condition. Their reaction is different. It does not mean that it's right. However, murder is also not right, and we've all seen murderers walk away unpunished or barely punished. I don't care what you want to say on that matter... It's a FACT. Now, we've seen it happen AGAIN, and it was so undeniable, that even a few racists (more on that later) I know have said it was murder.
So then I hear.... All they need to do is peacefully protest, and they will be fine. Where the heck have you been?!? There have been peaceful protests for decades, and they haven't worked. Not only that, but they've often suffered consequences, for practicing their right to protest.
Colin Kaepernick protested quietly. He was chastised and lost his job. His fellow NFL players who joined him in the peaceful protests, were threatened with consequences, until they gave up. I heard a lot of yelling about disrespect. The only disrespect, were the people who were fighting for them to lose their right to protest. Nowhere in flag etiquette, does it says it's disrespectful to kneel. It does say... Do NOT display a flag horizontally... You know, like over large football fields. It does say... Do not print the image of the flag on clothing, napkins, items that will be disposed of carelessly (paper plates, cups, hats, necklaces, cake frosting, etc). It does say... Never let it touch the ground... You know like the turf of a football field. It was ridiculously ironic, watching people yell at people silently protesting injustice, that they were disrespecting the flag, while wearing shirts with the flag printed on them and flag bandannas. If you're really concerned about disrespect to the flag.... Quit using the image of the flag, on ANYTHING other than an actual flag. Also, call the Sports conglomerates, and tell them to quit displaying the flag horizontally.
The fact of the matter, was many of those yelling about the flag being disrespected, weren't really focused on the flag. They were focused on the fact that the protest was about respect and equality for PEOPLE OF COLOR, and some that it was against (corrupt murderous) police officers.
Dr. Martin Luther King Jr was murdered.
Rosa Parks was arrested.
Countless peaceful protesters have been subjected to bean bag/rubber bullets, tear gas, arrest.
So, if you're going to keep encouraging peaceful protests, then you better demand action from those in positions to create the changes, the peaceful protests are calling for. History has shown, peaceful doesn't always equal successful.
We recently watched armed people, protesting at hospitals and government buildings. I didn't hear uproar then. They were armed. They shouted nasty remarks at nurses and doctors, who were blocking their street access, so ambulances could get through. Where was the rage then?! Oh that's right, not only were they mostly white, but the weren't fighting on behalf of equality.
I know not all cops are bad. I know a few bad apples shouldn't ruin the bunch. However, that old phrase doesn't work in this situation. The problem is our system has continuously, for decades, allowed the police (if corrupt) to use their power to suppress and even murder people of color, and get away with it. Or get consequences far less that what was deserved. There are so many amazing cops. I know quite a few. I chose a cop to be Whit's Godfather. My Auntie was an amazing cop. However, unfortunately for the good cops, too many bad cops have gotten away with too much, and peaceful protests aren't working, so people are becoming desperate to enact change. This is causing for our good officers to now be in danger, which terrifies me. I'm praying the good ones, start calling out the bad ones.
If being peaceful hasn't brought about change, then rioting is what comes to mind. Don't be quiet. Be loud. Scream it to the Heavens... Get change started.
This is a time, when people need to decide which side of history they want to be on. The side of equality for ALL, or the side that hates based on skin color.
We white people, who understand that we aren't truly a great country, until all of its citizens have total equality, must use our white privilege to help people of color accomplish necessary change. The rest of you, need to get ready for the battle you're starting.
At the end of the day.... We are all human. We all have the same needs and similar wants. We need to start worrying about our own lives, and quit trying to control the lives of others.
Don't like someone? Don't be their friend.
Don't like something? Don't do it.
At the end of it all, we are all going to be judged based on our own choices. So make your choices, and let others make their own.
So, as I think about my Kat today, I can't help but be grateful she's safe, even if it isn't with me.
So, if you're still with me, let me make a few things clear.
1. Black lives matter.
2. Nobody is above the law.
3. Murder is murder. Murderers should be convicted and punished.
4. Bacon is gross.
5. Women deserve equal pay.
6. I support marriage. I don't think "gay marriage" should be a thing. I think any one legal-aged consenting adult, should be able to marry any legal-aged consenting adult they want. Marriage should simply be marriage.
7. For people fixated on sin... Hate the sin, not the sinner. Plus, you really need to leave the judging to God, and focus on love and kindness and compassion.
8. If it's not your bedroom, and the occupants are consenting adults.... Mind your business.
9. Do not try to make another person's rage at an injustice affecting them, unjustified, when you cannot possibly comprehend their feelings, or you're a part of the cause of the injustice/rage. Your actions/words causing their rage, is your choice/opinion/right. Just as their reaction to your actions/words, is their choice/opinion/right.
10. I cannot believe I'm the mom of a seventeen year old. I'm old.
11. In terms of the riots/protests occurring recently around hospitals, and nurses needing to block traffic, so a street could be open for ambulances, doctors, nurses, staff to come and go.... My take is... I would have taken the nurse's place, and let her/him return to saving lives.
12. I believe in love, kindness, joy, treating others well and with compassion, justice, peace, equality, and unity.
13. Our medical system, educational system, justice system, and government should never have become for-profit entities.
14. Animal Crossing is awesome.
15. The current treatment of Native Americans is abhorrent.
16. I was raised a Republican. Grew up to be an Independent, but I'm currently (and probably forever) a Democrat. One of the greatest moments in life, happened a few years before my dad died. We had a very in depth talk one day. Sadly, it was only a few months later, when he found out he had cancer AGAIN. I cannot believe I am going to speak publicly about this, but I don't think he'd mind. One of the first things he did, was apologize to me for what he said, when I called to tell him Kat went to Heaven. He had said it was good for her. Better to be in Heaven than to have to live life as a n*****. He also brought up politics, which scared me, because we didn't ever see totally eye to eye. We both agreed trump would be a terrible POTUS. I was shocked. He apologized for his anger about me having a couple of relationships with men of color. He told me things were different when he was young, and he was stubborn, so it took him a while to truly see things for what they are and should be. The reason I revealed that, was to say... Racism is not natural. We are born seeing each other as fellow humans. Racism is taught. Just because you're taught it, doesn't mean you need to carry it on. I think if people truly listened to their hearts, they would see the correctness of equality. A human being is a human being, and no human's worth is based on their skin color.
17. Back to the racists I know comment.... Over the years, many people I know have used the n word in front of me, and made racist statements. As a child, I minded my own business, as I was raised to. As an adult, I've learned to just be quiet and leave ASAP, if I'm the only one who is affected by it. When I leave, I cry. I cry so hard, because when folks use that word in reference to all black people, they're insulting my daughter. If it's used around any person or persons of color, I call it out, and defend the persons of color present. Well, from now on, I'm done being quiet. You want to say some racist ignorance around me, I'm no longer going to just go away and cry. I'm going to call you out. I. Do. Not. Care. Who. You. Are. To. Me. You want to use words insulting my Kat and her fellow human beings of color.... Well, get ready for this Mama to verbally knock the ignorance out of you.
I think I will leave the list at seventeen, since Kat is seventeen.
Also, if you'd like to do a small act of kindness today or any day, in honor of our Kat, her sister and I would appreciate it.
My love to you all. May we all have joy, love, safety, good health, and equality.

So, please, if you are a person of color, know that I am your ally. I am here to listen and to help.

If you are not a person of color, please help in any way you can. We should not still be fighting for racial equality. This is something we need to focus on and get it done.

Now, that you have read my post, please do not forget to read the rest of the amazing Poison Blog with Friends posts!!!

Karen of Baking In A Tornado
Garden Vegetable Fettuccine

Lydia of Cluttered Genius
I Choose Me

Tamara of Part-time working Hockey Mom
I need a new dishwasher because of reasons

Melissa of My Heartfelt Sentiments


Welcome to June's Blog with Friends!! Each month a theme is chosen and then participating bloggers use the theme, to create their own un...