Friday, November 27, 2015

Clean Up on Aisle Stove #FunnyFriday November 2015

Today’s post is this month’s Funny Friday, a regular feature published on the last Friday of every month. Funny Friday is a collaborative project. Each month one of the participants submits a picture, then we all write five captions or thoughts inspired by that month’s picture. Links to the other bloggers’ posts are below, click on them and see what they’ve come up with. I hope we bring a smile to your face as you start your weekend.

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Here’s today’s picture. It was submitted by the fabulous Tamara of Confessions of a part-time working mom! Thank you for such an interesting picture! <3

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1. Spaghetti leader to chef: We will not be forced to change! We will remain in our natural state, you will not eat us! C'mon y'all! Run! Do not give in to the softening powers of the water!

2. Wife to hubby: Does the spaghetti look like that when I cook? No. The point is to get the spaghetti IN the pot! Go watch TV, and let me finish this!
Hubby to himself: Yes! I bet she will never ask for help again!

3. Child to mom: See, Mom! I helped!
Mom to herself: Oh Gee.
Mom to child: Aw! That's great! Thank you so much! Now go play, and I finish up!

4. Hubby to wife: I think it's time you go to the eye doctor.
Wife: Why?
Hubby: You cannot even see what you are doing anymore.
Wife: You have no idea what you are talking about. I can see just fine! Now, where did I put my wooden spoon? I swear I just had it.

5. Anyone else look at this, and get the serious urge to play Pick Up Sticks?!?! Just me?

For everyone that celebrated.... I hope you all had a very blessed Thanksgiving! We Berghams had a great day! Yummy food and great company! I did well in Fantasy Football. I was able to buy a homeless man a warm meal at Denny's. Overall a great day!

Thank you for taking the time to check out my contribution to this month's Funny Friday! Now, go forth and let my friends make you giggle!

Click on the links below and let some other bloggers make you smile:

Tuesday, November 17, 2015


My friends and I decided to all write poetry inspired by Thanksgiving. :) So, here is my contribution. I hope you enjoy it! 

Poem 1:

God has blessed me so much.
Over the years I have had so much happiness.
Blessings have been great.
Burdens have been frequent, but bearable.
Love has been abundant.
Every day has been a blessing, even the bad ones.

Poem 2:

I find myself being thankful for you on a regular basis.
Thankful for all the good times we had.
Thankful for all the bad times as well.
Those bad times taught me so much.
They taught me about myself and about life.
They made me the person I am today.
You changed my life, you changed me.
You taught me how to love.
You taught me how to please and be pleased.
You taught me how to survive losing love.
You taught me how to move on.
Loving you and losing you, it all made me a better person.
I am so grateful you were a part of my history.
You prepared me for my future.
I always thought you would be a part of my future,
but I have become okay with the fact you are gone.
You taught me how to live with you,
and I have learned how to live without you.
I am very thankful for everything.
I am thankful for you.
I am thankful for the love,
and I am thankful for the loss.

Thank you for taking the time to read my poetry! Please enjoy the poetry created my all of my friends as well! 

Robin of Someone Else's Genius   Ode to Turkey Day
Candice of Measurements of Merriment   Thanksgiving Poems
Dawn of Spatulas on Parade   Thanksgiving Haiku
Steena of The Angrivated Mom A Tiime For Thanks

Friday, November 13, 2015

Cookie Baker #UseYourWords November 2015

Today’s post is a writing challenge. This is how it works: participating bloggers picked four to six words or short phrases for someone else to craft into a post. All words must be used at least once and all the posts will be unique as each writer has received their own set of words. That is the challenge, here is a fun twist; no one who is participating knows who got their words and in what direction the writer will take them. Until now.

My words are: 
seasons ~ euphemism ~ honor ~ century ~ rise
They were submitted by:  (Thank you for the inspirational words! :))

As I lay here watching your chest rise with each breath,
and my mind wanders to thoughts of last night,
when you chose to honor my body,
by giving me the best orgasm of the century.
I cannot help but wonder when you will wake,
and what will happen next.
Will you be gone again before I can properly say Good morning?
Will you stay around a while?
I never know how you will act,
what you will say,
or when I will see you next.
Christmas is quickly approaching.
I spent so many of the holiday seasons of the past alone.
My days void of your presence.
My holidays spent missing you and longing for your embrace.
Will this year be the same?
Or will you show up, surprising me, and making my day perfect.
You used to always be around.
Every single day.
We use to pass the time talking and kissing and existing together.
We made each other happy.
We made each other complete.
I miss those days.
I miss those moments of happiness.
I miss making wonderful memories with you.
Like that lazy Christmas night, back in 2006.
The one we spent on the pile of pillows in the den,
watching movies, eating popcorn, and enjoying each other.
That was the day you decided that cookies most definitely needed to be a euphemism for orgasms. 
I have never been able to eat a cookie without giggling since.
Now, it seems like that is all we are to each other.
I miss when we were so much more than cookies.
I miss when you were an actual part of my life.
I miss you. I miss us. Not this us, but the old us.
The us when we actually lived together, and not just lived and occasionally saw each other.
Of course we have never actually lived together.
You would never do that.
That would be too settled. Too normal. Too domestic.
You thrive on being undomesticated and a rebel.
You thrive on beating your own drum rhythm and living your own life.
Maybe one day you will change your rhythm. 
Maybe one day we can make a rhythm in tandem.
Maybe we can create a life together.
Under the same roof.
With the same goals.
Maybe one day.
I won't hold my breath.
For now I will simply enjoy these moments,
when you choose to include me in your life.
When you come and make some memories.
When we share some cookies and a laugh or two.
When you act almost like things never changed.
Like you never walked away.
Like you never decided I didn't fit into your plan. 
Like you never decided I didn't fit you.
Until then I will just lay here, next to you,
while you sleep next to me.
I will silently tell you how much I love you.
Tell you how much you mean to me.
Then once you wake, I will pretend to sleep,
so you can slip out silently, like you always do.
Leaving me to wonder when you will return.
Knowing when you do, it won't be the real you.
The you I fell in love with.
The you that showed me what love and cookies are.
That taught me how to be bold and brave.
The you that made me dream of the future.
The you I love.
It will be this you.
The one that comes and goes randomly.
Never really saying much.
Never really connecting with me.
It will be the cookie baker.

I hope you enjoyed how I used my words! I hope you all have a fabulous weekend! Please take a few minutes to check out all the other Use Your Words posts! I am certain my friends have written some amazing posts, using their words perfectly! 

Links to the other “Use Your Words” posts:                                     Baking In A Tornado                          Spatulas on Parade                                          The Momisodes                                 Sparkly Poetic Weirdo                        Southern Belle Charm
                      Rena’s World                              Never Ever Give Up Hope                               Dinosaur Superhero Mommy                The Bergham Chronicles              Eileen’s Perpetually Busy                   Confessions of a part-time working mom                   Someone Else’s Genius                               Climaxed                 The Angrivated Mom

Friday, November 6, 2015

Starring Jules #SecretSubjectSwap November 2015

Welcome to this month's Secret Subject Swap. This week fourteen brave bloggers picked a secret subject for someone else and were assigned a secret subject to interpret in their own style. Today we are all simultaneously divulging our topics and submitting our posts. 

Your “Secret Subject” is:
If you could write yourself into a novel, television show, or film, what would we see you in? What character would you play? How would your presence change the story or would it?
It was submitted by:   (Thanks you for the wonderful subject! I really had fun considering all the possible options!)

I once wrote about one of my favorite television shows, "The Good Wife", and I really enjoyed putting myself into the mindset of being a character. You can read about that here.

I have sat and thought about this subject, and approached from a million different angles. Part of me wants to write myself into a Matt Damon movie, so I can be his best friend. Part of me wants to write myself into some action packed movie or show, so I can live an exciting life. Part of me wants to be part of Grey's Anatomy, so I can be BFFs with some of my favorite characters, and save people's lives. Plus, let's face it, Meredith needs a new person. I would happily be her person.

The thought of being Matt Damon's BFF, really just makes me happy. I love that man. He is one of my most favorite human beings ever. I love basically every movie he is in. I just cannot seem to pick one to slide myself into. I would want to fit seamlessly into. I would not want change things very much. I would want to be his BFF, not his love interest. I know, weird. I have been in love with him since I was fourteen years old, so nearly twenty years, but I don't want to date him. I have always wanted to be the female Ben Affleck to his life. He seems like he would be the most amazing friend. 

Keeping with the BFF idea, I began to ponder the actresses I would not mind being BFFs with... Julia Roberts, Sandra Bullock, Emma Stone, Reese Witherspoon, Alyssa Milano, etc etc So, then I start thinking about which movie would be fun to be added to. There are so many options. So many fabulous options.  Do you realize how many wonderful movies there are in this world? So, then I start thinking about the cast as a whole. Which one would be the most epic? Which makes me think about the Ocean movies. I would get Matt Damon, Julia Roberts, AND George Clooney! Yep. Take a moment and consider that.

You guys! Do you know how many thoughts are racing through my head. So many thoughts. So many possibilities. Endless possibilities.

After careful and detailed consideration, I have decided to be part of "Erin Brockovich" with Julia Roberts. I know. I know. I should have probably picked a Matt Damon movie. It would be a true dream come true. I had to choose the way I did, because I think helping Julia/Erin kick PG&E's booty would be awesome. Plus, I could stay by her side and help her take on other bad for the environment and world companies. We could defend the little guy against the big, bad guys. 

I think it would be fulfilling. It would be fun. It would be worth it. It would be amazing. Plus, let's face it, Julia Roberts. Not to mention, the real Erin Brockovich seems awesome.

I would not really want to change anything. I would just want to fit in. Help. I would want to do more than just the one movie. I would want to turn into a movie series. I would want us to help thousands of people. I think it would be exhilarating and fun! Totally worth it! 

My second choice, would be either NCIS: LA or Grey's Anatomy.

On NCIS: LA, I would like to be the newest agent. I would like to help solve every crime, and always have every one's back. I would also like to be very close to Hattie. Maybe I could even learn some of her secrets. I would definitely like to help Callen find out about his past. I feel like he needs some closure, though I suspect it is a very complex situation. I don't think I would complain if Callen and I ended up being a couple. Sam would be my first choice, but he is very much taken. I should add, I love the name Callen. Had Gigi been a boy, Callen was very high on the list of possible names. It is a show that I consider to be one of my favorites.

On Grey's Anatomy, I would want to be a well rounded, knowledgeable surgeon that can help everyone. I would want to help solve the most complicated cases. I would want to Meredith's person. I would also want to be Arizona's person. I would want to be friends with everyone. I would want to be the Switzerland of the show. I would want to be the person that everyone can trust and come to. As for a love interest, I don't know. Maybe it would be best I am single. That way I can stay focused on saving lives. 

So, what show or movie would you choose to be a part of? Would you change things drastically or just fit in seamlessly? Which actor or actress would you most want to spend time with? 

Here are links to all the sites now featuring Secret Subject Swap posts.  Sit back, grab a cup, and check them all out. See you there:                          Baking In A Tornado                                          The Momisodes                  Spatulas on Parade                                 Sparkly Poetic Weirdo                       Never Ever Give Up Hope                               The Lieber Family Blog                                   Rena’s World                         Dinosaur Superhero Mommy                 Confessions of a part-time working mom                       Just a Lovely Day                 Someone Else’s Genius                       Climaxed               The Angrivated Mom


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