For some reason, whenever I hear the words 'new year', I always think of resolutions and change. So, when I read this month's theme, that is immediately where my mind went. Now, if you know me, you know that I am not one to make resolutions. I like to make goals, and then I like to work to complete them, but I don't hate on myself if/when I fall short. This is probably a bad thing, but it works for me.
However, going into this new year, I definitely have some changes I want to see happen. I have been struggling with the grief over my father's death since September, and it has really led me to take a deep look at myself. I have decided on a list of changes I really want to see happen in 2019. I figure if I share them with the world, it may help me to stick to the process, to make them happen.
So, here are my goals for 2019.
1. Be a better mom. This is my biggest thing I want. I want to yell less. I want to laugh more. I want to do more. I want to complete the entire backlog, of all the activities I want to do. I want to do at least two activities for each holiday we celebrate. I want to mark off some of our do/see list. It is a list of places I want to go with Gigi. Each year it grows longer. I want to shorten it in 2019. I just want my relationship with Gigi to deepen. I also want to fill up at least one journal for her to read, once she is an adult. I wanted to do one a year, and gift them to her on her eighteenth birthday, but I have not accomplished an average of one a year. I want to do one whole on this year. When this year ends, I want to feel like I was a good mom.
2. I want to finish off my tattoo list, with the exception of my Bob Marley tattoo. I have made progress on this. I got the owl dream catcher I wanted. I go on the 15th to get two other tattoos marked off. I go on the 18th to get a third marked off. So, that leaves the tattoo I want in honor of my dad, the fun tattoo I want of a random thing (long story for another post), and my Bob Marley tattoo. My Bob Tattoo is going to cost a fortune. It will need to be planned accordingly. I will get it. Most likely not this year though.
3. I want to become a better cook. I am not going to hold my breath on this one, or be too hard on myself. It seems rare that Chad and Gigi LOVE my cooking. I would like to end the year with a handful of dishes I can make, that they love. Fingers crossed. Also, baked goods do not count.
4. I want to end this year healthier than I start it. I definitely won't be too hard on myself. This is mostly out of my control. I just want to be better about that part that I can control. I also want to end the year able to ride my new bike really well. Fingers cross.
5. I want to do more me time. Time I spend actually working on myself, or doing something I genuinely enjoy. Not just time spent alone or quiet. I want to have productive me time. We shall see.
6. I want to end the year at peace with my daddy's passing. I may not be over it, anytime soon, but I want to be at peace with it.
7. I want to have regular date nights. Obviously, Gigi will be there too, but I want to make the outing special for Chad and I, and enjoy the together time.
8. I want to have some girl nights. Maybe three or four total for the year. I do not know if I will succeed at this one, but I can try.
9. I want to volunteer more. This one does not need explanation. I just want to do more good.
10. I want to end the year, with a solid plan for celebrating my next birthday. I always say I am going to celebrate, and then I never do. I need to change that. A good friend told me I deserve to be celebrated. So, I hope to end this year with a plan for my next birthday (January 2, 2020).
So, there you have it. I am hoping to write a post in December, about how well I did with these goals. Fingers crossed.
What are your goals or resolutions for 2019?! Do you have some?! I would love to hear them!!
Feel free to hold me accountable throughout the year!!
Now, make sure you check out these other awesome Blog with Friends posts:
Karen of Baking In A Tornado
Dawn of Spatulas On Parade
Minette of Southern Belle Charm
Lydia of Cluttered Genius
Give yourself time as far as your dad is concerned. My Daddy passed 5 1/2 years ago. I'm okay now, but it took a long time. I still miss him but now I smile when I think of him instead of cry. you'll get there, there is no time line on grief and everyone processes it differently. Which is perfectly okay. If you find it is especially difficult, find someone to talk to, a counselor, priest, doctor...and that's okay too.
ReplyDeleteWell wishes on your list of changes. I have my own list as well and not resolutions, these are MUST do things.
Cheers to a better, brighter 2019!
These are wonderful goals and I have no doubt that you'll try to meet them. I do worry about the "better mom" one, I think you focus too much on what you feel you aren't doing right and not enough time on what you are.
ReplyDeleteYou are a great mom, so don't beat yourself up on that one too much. And when GiGi is grown, what she is going to remember more than any one thing is that she always knew she was loved. The yelling? We all do that.
ReplyDeleteMy Daddy has been gone almost 13 years. I miss him just as much as I did on the day he left us. It does get easier, but it took me 2 years to not cry every day. So don't be hard on yourself and don't rush it. Just don't.