My “Secret Subject” is: What is the biggest regret in your life? Why?
It was submitted by: http://theblogging911.com/blog (Rena, thank you for this fabulous subject!!)
I live by the motto of not having regrets. I firmly believe everything happens for a reason, even our mistakes and bad choices. It is the combination of all the things that happen in our lives, that make us the people we are. If any one part of my life were changed, I would not be exactly the person I am.
In recent years, I have been asked often about regrets, and so I have thought about them. Truly, I would not change a single thing, and I regret nothing. However, there are a few things, that I do sorta wish had just never happened.
1. Making choices for treatment of my physical issues. One thing made me very ill, and I would have loved to have never gotten ill. Another made me gain seventy pounds. Do you know how impossible it is to lose seventy pounds, when you are highly limited by being unable to exercise. So, not trying those treatments, and suffering the consequences, would be great.
2. Choosing to allow Gigi to be named the name her father picked for her. The name has no special meaning to him, and I gave up naming her something that meant a great deal to me. I wish I had stuck to my guns and really drove home how much that name meant to me. Gigi has definitely grown into her name, and I do think it is a lovely name. I just really loved my choice. Plus, the meaning was deep for me. It is okay though. She has a name, and that is all that matters.
3. Not getting certain promises made to me in writing. Having them in writing would definitely be helpful.
4. After I had surgery in 2012, I ended up getting an infection, and I was put on an antibiotic. Things went down hill, and I did not feel well at all. I kept going to the ER, and sadly, kept being seen by the same doctor. He told me I was having anxiety, gave me anxiety meds, and sent me home. I kept trying to tell him that it was definitely not anxiety. I got so sick, I could not even walk. I was on bed rest. It led to me getting a blood clot in my leg, which paralyzed me for a while. On top of that, I was right. It was not anxiety. I was allergic to the antibiotic I was taking for the infection, and with each daily dose, I was killing myself. It got to the point, that I was kissing death on the cheek, but some really amazing paramedics saved me. It was when they brought me to the hospital, that they also found the clot. I was very sick for a long while, and I have never been quite the same. I wish I had stood my ground with that doctor, and demanded help beyond being pumped full of anxiety meds. I also wish I had reported him to the medical board. I really should have. I refuse to be treated by him now, and on two occasions witnessed him giving other patients anxiety meds. One of those patients was there, because he had been in a really bad car accident. To this day, I wonder if I am the only one he wrongly diagnosed as suffering from anxiety.
5. My tattoos. Well, my first two. Yeah, if I were to get them now, I would change what they are and where they are. Hindsight. Eh.
So, there you have it. I think that is pretty much all that I regret. I might would change parts of number four, if possible, but overall I would not change anything. I am who I am, because of everything that has happened.
What is your biggest regret?!
I hope you all have a fabulous weekend!!
Here are links to all the sites now featuring Secret Subject Swap posts. Sit back, grab a drink, and check them all out. See you there:
Medical decisions are so difficult. I didn't learn until I had kids that we need to trust our own instincts, if what the doctor is doing doesn't fit with what we know is going on, we need to find a new doctor. We used to hold doctors in such high esteem that we lost our own instincts in our reverence of them. I hope every decision you make from now on takes your own feelings into account.
ReplyDeleteGigi was my nickname growing up and it is now my company name - Gigi's. When we sit down and look at our regrets it helps us to focus on what good came from them - which is what you have done. My Secret Subject this month is almost like yours and I had to list what I would have sold my soul for to change what happened.
ReplyDeleteI've learned the last year to trust my instincts on medical issues. And I have been proven right every time so far! Great subject!
ReplyDeleteI went through something similar in 2009 and the problem wasn't figured out until 2011. By that time I couldn't walk, couldn't use the bathroom and was bleeding internally...but it was all in my head!
ReplyDeleteOh no, what a horrible experience with the doctor and surgery. It scary when you think you can trust a doctor but your own instincts are better. I have learned my lesson after what happened when I was pregnant with my guy.
ReplyDeleteI think regrets can keep us locked in the past instead of allowing us to move forward. All decisions have consequences and sometimes they work out better than other times. That's just how life works!
ReplyDelete