Give A Dog A Bone Sept. 2016 #FunnyFriday

Today’s post is this month’s Funny Friday, a regular feature published on the last Friday of every month. Funny Friday is a collaborative project. Each month one of the participants submits a picture, then we all write five captions or thoughts inspired by that month’s picture. Links to the other bloggers’ posts are below, click on them and see what they have come up with. I hope we bring a smile to your face as you start your weekend.

Here is today’s picture. It was submitted by Not That Sarah Michelle

1. Dog to himself: I knew it! I knew she was holding out on me. Looks like she saved the good stuff for herself. My dinner looked nothing like that. What is that?! A T-Bone?!

2. Dog to other dog: Can you please hurry up in there!

Dog back to dog at door: I am hurrying! Geez!

Dog to other dog: Hurrying? This is what you call hurrying? You have been in there for hours! The humans will be home soon, and I still have not had my turn to soak!

Dog to dog at door: Hold your horses! I will be done in two minutes, now give me some privacy!

3. Human to dog: Hey! Get out of here! I am trying to pee!

Dog to himself: Sure! I look at her peeing and it is a travesty, but she always leads me around on a leash and watches me pee, like no big deal. Geez. Silly human. Maybe I want some privacy!

4. Dog to himself: Well, from the looks of it, I have maybe five minutes to go hide my bones. She is almost done in the shower. Hopefully this time she doesn't move them. If I didn't want them under the couch, I wouldn't put them there.

5. Dog to himself: Ugh. Look at the tiny human making a mess in there. I bet it gets blamed on me, AGAIN. Always my fault.

This is what I came up with, using this adorable dog as my muse. I hope you all have a fantastic weekend! Now, don't forget to check out the other blogs featuring this month's Funny Friday!

Click on the links below and let some other bloggers make you smile:

Baking In A Tornado

Spatulas on Parade

Measurements of Merriment

Dinosaur Superhero Mommy

Not That Sarah Michelle

Southern Belle Charm

My Happy Face #TopTenThursday

Welcome to this week's #TopTenThursday. This is a fun writing challenge, that is hosted by Tamara of Confessions of a part-time working mom. Her, myself, and other bloggers, come together and post weekly Top Ten lists, which we create based on a chosen topic. I hope you enjoy reading my list, as much as I loved creating it.

Last week, we shared our Top Ten Talents. I really struggled with it. This week, we are sharing our Top Ten Things That Make Us Happy. As you can imagine, I did not struggle with this topic. Well, unless you count narrowing it down to just ten things, a struggle. So, without further ado, here in random order, are the ten things that always make me happy.

1. Gigi. I am sure y'all knew this one, right?! I think it is a given. Even on her worst days, and my worst days, she is a huge happy spot. She completes me, and makes me so happy. She is my sunshine, even on the darkest of days.

1 b. Chad. Yeah, he annoys the living daylights out of me, but he is my BEST friend, and he gave me Gigi.

2. Coffee. I can be in the grumpiest of moods, and take one sip of coffee, and BAM... Happiness. Truly. It warms me to my soul, and I don't mean heat warmth, I mean the warmth of happiness. You probably were not surprised by this one either. 

3. Doctor Who. I know. This one probably was a surprise. It just makes me happy. I love all things Doctor Who, especially the show itself. If you knew me, you would probably be even more surprised by this one making the list. I am not into Sci-Fi. I do LOVE LOVE LOVE Doctor Who though. I even wish I had owned a ton of Who gear. Maybe one day! 

4. Ellen. Y'all... I can be in a horrible mood. Feeling sick and just miserable, and I can watch Ellen, and she is just the biggest pick-me-up! Seriously! She is so darn funny, and she is always saying such beautiful things, and doing such amazingly kind things! I just adore her. I often seek out videos of her, when I am grumpy, or not feeling well. It is actually on my bucket list, to go see her show live one day. I would love to dance with her! She is AWESOME!

5. Painting. Really, art in general, but especially painting. Painting is my happy place. I honestly have not done any really painting in years, but it is my absolute happy place. I get lost in it. I can forget my worries, and just focus on existing and creating art. I really wish I had a small studio, and could paint on a regular basis. 

6. Pay It Forward. Anytime I am able to pay it forward, or hear of others paying it forward, I get happy to the deepest depths of my soul.

7. Matt Damon. Him. His movies. His interviews. Basically all things Matt Damon. There is only one thing I am not happy with him about... He is a *gulp* New England Patriots fan. Hey, everyone is flawed eh? His just happens to be a yucky flaw, but in the grand scheme of things, it could be worse. He could be a Yankees fan...

8. Reading. I love love love love love to read. Anytime I get to read for a bit, I am a happy girl. Yep. I will sacrifice sleep, even if I am exhausted, just to have a few minutes of reading time. Reading has always been one of my happy places. Long before I had art, I had reading.

9. Swimming! I really love to swim. So so so much love for swimming! I do not get the opportunity to swim, as often as I would like, but when I do get the chance to swim, it makes me so completely happy. It is so peaceful and restful. I just love it so very very very much! 

10. #Mommitment. Oh my goodness, y'all!!! This makes me SO HAPPY! Especially the Mommitment Facebook Group!! Just a bunch of moms showing each other love, kindness, support, acceptance, and friendship. It is just a beautiful thing. Such a wonderful thing, and I am so grateful to be a part of it. 

Honorable mentions: Road trips. Bowls of chicken and dumplings or Grilled cheese sandwiches and tomato soup. Working in my Happy Planner. Writing. Giving gifts.

So, did my list shock you?! Were you expecting it?! Some shocked you, others not so much!? What are the things that make you happy?! Are any on your list on mine as well?! 

Don't forget to visit the Top Ten Lists of my fellow bloggers, and find out what makes them happy!!

Tamara at Confessions of a part-time working mom

My Friend Fly Sept. 2016 #FlyOnTheWall

Welcome to a Fly on the Wall group post. Today nine bloggers are inviting you to catch a glimpse of what you would see if you were a fly on the wall in our homes. Come on in and buzz around my house.

So, I had to name this post "my friend fly", because no other title seemed appropriate at this time. Gigi has a sudden obsession with flies and *gulp* spiders. I have considered disowning her multiple times, but unfortunately, I kinda love her. A lot. So, I guess I will keep her, despite her obvious insanity. I mean... Who likes spiders?! Not me, that is for sure. In fact, I am freaking out, just because I am typing about them right now.

Anyway, so along with her obsession with flies, comes her calling them "my friend fly" ___. Yes, she gives them names. So, it will be... Oh! There is a fly! My friend fly (some crazy sounding name like Oomoolala). On a couple occasions, we had flies fly into our car, and I will roll down the window, and shoo them out, and she gets upset. So, I have started to tell her, I let them out so they can join their families. It is a whole situation. At least she is entertaining eh?!

So, she has really been developing and learning at the speed of light lately. I am saddened and proud, all at once. Part of me wants to freeze time, and keep her young, and part of me cannot wait to see the woman she grows into. So, some of my Fly On The Wall entries this month, may be a bit controversial, and I am okay with that. If you were truly a fly in my home, you would see me realizing how much she has grown, and realizing I can no longer get away with things I once could, because she is paying attention and learning. So, now I have to censor myself, and really think before I speak and act. Yes, that is the point the Bergham household is currently at. So, without further ado, here is your glimpse into our home...

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So, I bought a new Espresso machine with a milk frother... I will pause while we all do a happy celebration dance.... and after I made my first cup, I was saying how truly delicious it was, and it caught Gigi's attention.  

Gigi: I want a sip, Mommy.
Me: No, honey, this is really strong coffee.
G: *pouts* Just a sip.
M: *thinks to myself* Well, this has a really strong taste. She will hate it, and then she will finally quit stealing sips of my coffees, and begging for sips.
G: Please, Mommy.
M: Okay. Just a small sip. You aren't going to like it.
G: *takes a sip* Mmmmm. I love it, Mommy.
M: You do not.
G: One more sip, please, Mommy.
M: Well, that backfired.
Chad: *laughing* She is consistent. She has always loved coffee.
M: Yeah, but this is strong espresso.

So, I guess I have to give up on trying to get her to hate coffee. I think she is just going to grow up to be a coffee lover.

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We went to Target to kill time one day, and Gigi got two new headbands and markers as a treat. So I wanted to show her what I got as a treat. I asked her to guess, what she thought Mommy would get as a treat.

Me: Mommy got a treat too! Guess what I got!
G: Umm... *thinks* Coffee? 
M: Yes! How did you know?! You're so smart. 
G: I just know. 
M: Yeah, you know Mommy loves coffee. 
*I show her my $5.48 coffee treat, and ask her if it looks yummy, and she nods*
G: I want my own coffee. 
M: Ummmm... I don't know. Don't you think you're a bit too young for coffee?! 
G: No. No, I don't think I too young, Mommy. I think coffee is good for me. I'm three now, Mommy. 
M: Ummmm.. I think you need to be at least five. 
G: No. I need to be three. It's time, Mommy. 
M: Time for what? 
G: My own coffee.

She is STILL waging the argument that it is time for her to have coffee of her own! We did get her some hot cocoa k-cups, and it has greatly helped. Of course, we may have called them coffee, and she may think she is drinking coffee, when she drinks them. In her defense, she told me they aren't as good as mommy's coffee, and she wants the same ones as mommy. LOL I guess she comes by it honest. I am a coffee addict, her father LOVES coffee, and her grandmother and grandfather (my mother and father) are coffee addicts. I was sipping coffee from the time I could drink, and started getting my own cups of coffee at the age of five. So, yes, it is safe to say she comes by the love of coffee naturally.

(Photo credit me: These are amazing. I went back and bought the other two boxes) 

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So, as part of the goody bags from her party, I gave tattoos... Some shark ones and other various Summer/beach themed ones (flamingos, sunglasses, flowers, suns, surfboards, etc). I have so many leftover ones, and we have started applying them to Gigi. She loves them. She is also a drama queen... (no clue where she gets that from...)

*me wetting the shark tattoo I am applying to her arm, and pressing it down*
G: Ow!
M: What?!
G: It hurts.
M: It does not. I am barely pressing on it.
G: It hurts so much!! Tattoos hurt!! OW!!
M: Do you want me to stop?!
G: No!!! I want my tattoos!!
M: Okay, then it must not hurt that badly.
G: It hurts so MUCH, Mom!

Afterwards, after I had applied all four tattoos (one on each arm and one on each leg), I was really pondering her saying they hurt. They weren't red, and it did not appear she was allergic or anything..... Then it hit me.... In the last year, I have gotten four tattoos. After each one she discusses them with me. Well, tattoos don't hurt me. I think it is possibly because I have such a high pain tolerance. That being said, I know she will one day be a teenager, and I know teens are prone to doing stupid things, so in hopes of preventing any stupid choices in her early teen years, I always tell her tattoos hurt A LOT! So, it dawned on me, she was really just being a drama queen, and was really just acting like they were hurting! LOL

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So, as I said, Whit has been naming flies lately. She has also been naming all her toys, and various other things. She has even changed her own name to Gouda. Before she was Gouda, she was Luca. 

G to Chad: My name is Luca.
Me: Your name is Gigi.
Chad: What is your name?!
Me: She said Luca.
Chad: Luca? Where did she get that name?
Me: I don't know. Out her ass. Where does she get any of these names lately.
G: Out my ass, Daddy. 
M: Ooops.
C: *looks at me*
M: *looks at him*
*we both laugh*
C: Gigi, you need to stop being so smart and repeating Mommy.
G: My name is Luca! 

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Gigi: Mommy, I need something.
Me: You do?
G: Yep.
M: What do you need?
G: I don't know.
M: Well, how can I help, if you cannot tell me what you need?!
G: I know what I need.
M: What do you need?
G: My own cup of coffee.
M: Um no. You don't need that.
G: I do.
M: How about apple juice?!
G: *sighs, obviously frustrated* I guess.

(Photo credit me: Gigi stealing a sip of my coffee) 

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One of Gigi's new things is to tell us to "shhhhhhh" whenever we say anything she doesn't like. She is so adorable doing it, but it is so annoying. I am working to get her to stop doing it, and she is getting better about not doing it. Unless if we are insisting she doesn't need coffee or candy. We still get the shhhhhhhh then. 

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Another one of Gigi's new things is saying when she feels people are being rude. Not just people though, sometimes objects are rude. 

*6 am*
Gigi: Mommy, my blanket is being rude.
M, half asleep: Huh?
Gigi: My blanket is being rude, and I cannot sleep.
M: How is it being rude?
G: It is not covering my feet.
*I cover her feet* 
G: Thank you, Mommy. *to her blanket* Stop being rude! My feet are cold.
*We go back to sleep*

To Gigi, it is rude to deny her candy, or to deny her coffee, or to make her leave the park, or to breathe (if it isn't exactly how she wants you to breathe).... Just don't tell her when she is being rude. She is never rude. LOL 

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So, I play this silly game called Cookie Jam. I am decent at it. I am on level 665. I like to play it before bed, and anytime I just need a mindless way to pass the time. The following happened one night, when I was playing, while waiting for dinner to be ready. 

*I used up my last move on an attempt to pass a level, and I only needed to break one more waffle cone, and it was a frustrating level I had been stuck on for days*
Me: No! No! NO! Ugh! Mother.... *caught myself*
G: Fucker!
*Chad and I both look at her, and then at each other*
M: Oh no!
C: Why are you so smart, Gigi?! Do not copy what your mom says! 
M: Yeah, don't repeat what I say.
G: Why not?
M: Well, Mommy says bad things, that only adults can say.
*Gigi gets frustrated, as she has been, because yet again she isn't old enough for something*
M: Yep, it is officially time to quit swearing. Oh well, it is awful anyway.
C: Yeah, she is too smart.
M: She gets it from me.
C: She gets the swearing from you.

So, yes, I am now working on watching my language at all times. 

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*Gigi walks up to me, with one of her toys stuffed in her shirt* There is a baby in my belly, Mommy.
Me: Oh, there is huh?
G: Yep. My baby.
M: Well, I don't think you are old enough to have babies in your belly.
G: I am! There is a baby in my belly!
M: Okay! Well, that makes me a Grandma, and I am really not old enough to be a Grandma.
G: Yes, you are. You are OLD, Mommy.
M: Thanks, Kid, I love you too.

This is her new thing. She loves to "have babies". All her toys are her baby. It is adorable. I like it. She has really started to like dolls, and her imagination is really developing.

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While at our friend's house, they mentioned pumpkin pie, and Gigi really wanted some, and so did I. So, I stopped on the way home to buy a pie. When we got home, I cut us each a piece of pie, and we ate it. It was Gigi's first time.

Me: Do you like the pie?
Gigi: Mmmm. It is yummy!!
Me: Good, I am glad you like it. Mommy likes it too, and I do not like much pie.
Gigi: I like the cinnamon in it. 
*my mind was blown*

She often makes observations about foods, that really baffle me. I do not think I have a very well developed palate. I cannot often pick apart dishes, and figure out what elements join together to create them. I did not even know there was cinnamon in pumpkin pie, until I was in my twenties, and read a recipe one day. 

(Photo credit me: First pumpkin pie of the year) 

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So, there you go! Things you would have seen, had you been a fly on the wall in the Bergham household. Our household is not that interesting, so be sure you check out what you would have seen and heard in my fellow bloggers' households!


Buzz on over to these sites for a peek into some other homes:

Baking In A Tornado

Menopausal Mother

                        Go Mama O                         

       Spatulas on Parade       

      Searching for Sanity      

        Never Ever Give Up Hope         

Dinosaur Superhero Mommy

When I Grow Up

Talented Ms. Bergham #TopTenThursday

Welcome to this week's #TopTenThursday. This is a fun writing challenge, that is hosted by Tamara of Confessions of a part-time working mom. Her, myself, and other bloggers, come together and post weekly Top Ten lists, which we create based on a chosen topic. I hope you enjoy reading my list, as much as I loved creating it.

Last week, we made a list of our Top Ten Favorite Famous People. This week, we are revealing our Top Ten Talents/Things We Are Good At. Well, last week's list was pretty easy for me. I did have to decide between a few options, to see who made it onto the top ten list, and who was a close runner up. Some were easy peasy, and an automatic addition to this (Think Matt Damon). Others, I had to really think if they were more of a favorite than one of the other options. So, yes, it took some thought, but was easy. Now, this week's list... Well, I spent days thinking about it. Contemplating. It really was not quite as easy as the last list. If you ask me my top ten faults, I would probably be in the same situation I was last week. Plenty of options, and just trying to rank them, to see which were in the top ten. Asking me positives about myself, well, that is hard.

It isn't that I don't think I have talents, or good traits, or things I am good at. It is just that I don't notice them as easily as I notice my faults. This is probably a bad thing, but it is the reality. I just think of it as being honest and realistic. So, without further ado, after much contemplation/discussion with Chad and Gigi, and in random order, I present my Top Ten Talents/Things I am Good At.... 

1. Writing. I really debated this one, not sure I was going to put this one on my list, but at the end of the day, I do write things I am proud of. Many of those things, do not get shown to anyone, but I am proud nonetheless. Not only do I think I am an okay writer, but I love to write. So, yes, I definitely felt this should be on the list.

2. Reading. I know what you are thinking... Reading is not a talent. Well, hear me out... I am a super speedreader. So, that is why I add it to this list. People are constantly in awe of how quickly I can read, and actually comprehend what I am reading. So, yes, this is an actually something I am good at, in my opinion.

3. (From Chad) Shopping online. To expand... I am good at finding good deals. 

4. (From Chad) "Our kid is still alive, so you're doing good at that." I would definitely like to think I am decently good at being a mother. I do my best, and I LOVE being a mom.

5. Picking out gifts for others. I don't know that I am great at it, but I have been given a lot of compliments on the gifts I choose for people. Most importantly, I LOVE buying/giving gifts. I wish I were super rich, just so I could give AMAZING gifts and donate to charities. 

6. (From Chad) Cookie Jam. I will give him this one, but I am really not great at it. It is just one of my top two go to tasks, when I need something mindless to pass the time.

7. (From Chad) Tolerating pain. Ehhhh.... I was really wondering if I should put this one, but he has a good point. I do have an extremely high pain tolerance. I am in pain all day, every day, so eventually you just kind get okay at just dealing with it.

8. (From Chad) Empathy, caring for people, caring about the world. Okay. So, this one made it, because before I enlisted his help, I had considered putting love on the list. I think I am really good at loving others. I genuinely love others. I want the best for everyone. I want happiness and peace worldwide. I hurt when others hurt. So, okay, this one made the cut.

9. (From Gigi) Playing with my Wubble ball. We spent time today really trying to get her to catch really well. I am really trying to teach her to keep her eyes on the ball. She is really good. I think it is because she has been obsessed with playing ball since she was an infant. She is even good at batting.

10. (From Chad) In the bedroom. Well, if I wasn't REALLY struggling to come up with ten, this would NOT be on the list. Sadly, I am adding this, and I still have three blank spots. Desperate times... Obviously he said it is jest. Maybe 10 should really be putting up with Chad and his shenanigans. 

So, I know, horrible top ten list. I am sorry. This topic was REALLY hard for me. Want to know my faults?! I could give you twenty in under two minutes. 

Do not forget to check out these other fabulous bloggers, and see what made their top ten list this week!! 

Tamara of Confessions of a part-time working mom

Liz of An American in Basel

Words To Update September 2016 #UseYourWords

Today’s post is a writing challenge. This is how it works: participating bloggers picked four to six words or short phrases for someone else to craft into a post. All words must be used at least once, and all the posts will be unique as each writer has received their own set of words. That is the challenge, here is a fun twist; no one who is participating knows who got their words and in what direction the writer will take them. Until now.

My words are:

Sad ~ Flag ~ Orange ~ Invitation ~ Log ~ Table

They were submitted by: Minette of Southern Belle Charm

I hope none of you are sad to learn that this month, my Use Your Words post will not be a continuation of my previous two; Stable Layne and Stable Layne Pt 2. I promise I will give you guys a part three, in the very near future. I had a yucky visit to the hospital today. I had to wear a horrible orange and blue hospital gown, and drink gross barium. So, I am not at my best.

I tend to have a lot on my table (plate), and so many of my posts get written within forty-eight hours of posting, though some do get written in advance. This one, I have been pondering over for over a week. Trying to figure out how to make these words fit the Stable Layne story, and I struggled with three of the words, so I decided to throw the yellow flag on the play. So, I will give you guys another installment, but just not now.

I have been like a bump on a log lately. I have been feeling sick for the last few weeks, so I have been hanging close to home. I decided to make the most of Chad's two vacation days, so I extended an invitation to a friend and her sons, and thankfully they accepted. So, we are going to a pottery place, to paint some pottery. I think Gigi is going to make Chad a coffee mug. Last year, she made me a pumpkin candle holder. I am not sure what I will have her make me this year. 

Have you ever gone to a pottery painting place? Gigi had so much last year. I am thinking about joining in on the fun this year. I was thinking we could use some decor in our house. I used to own a lot of decor, but gave it all away, once I learned I was pregnant. Looking back, that was so silly. I just got scared I would not baby proof it properly, and my baby would get hurt. Now, looking back, I definitely should have kept it all. The one good thing about not having any decor items, it is easier to clean. Plus, our house now is so small, I think much decor stuff would make it feel even more crowded. So, for now, our house style is "toy box". It is one big, play space for Gigi. Eventually, her toys will be confined to her room only, and I will get some decor. 

I also wanted to let y'all know, I am trying to make some changes to the blog. I am trying to write more, and I am going to try to change the overall look and feel of the blog as well. This is more of a "hobby" status blog, but I love it very much, and I love each of you that take the time to read the words I write. So, I want to make the blog itself better, and I want to share more of my writing/thoughts/words/ideas with y'all. I am even considering getting my own paid domain. I hope you all enjoy the changes that get made. If at anytime you want to offer feedback, please do! Have you connected with  me on my Facebook page yet? I am always available to chat there! 

Now, I wanted to give you guys a bit of information on Stable Layne. In the beginning, I was not sure I would add much to it, but the feedback I received was positive, so I decided I would definitely add on. I want to let you all know, I already know the entire plot. How it plays out and how it ends. I even have a second story in my mind, it is the story of Layne's brother and Gwyn. I have recently started to form a third one, it follows Layne's sister. So, we will see where it all goes. I hope you enjoy it, as much I as I have enjoyed formulating it in my mind. That being said, the third installment will be coming soon. The fourth installment, will most likely be connected to next month's Use Your Words post, so definitely make sure you check back!!

That being said, I will definitely share pictures of tomorrow's trip to the pottery studio!! I am so excited!! I am hoping to fit in a beach trip this weekend as well! Plus, we have the local Fall festival coming up, and we want to take a trip to Apple Hill. Of course I will be sharing Halloween pictures as well. I just LOVE this time of year!! How about you?! Do you love Fall?! What is your favorite part?! I love that I can wear orange, and not look a bit out of place!! 

I hope you all have a lovely weekend!! I am sorry this was not an exciting post, but I had wanted to give you guys a heads up about the changes being made, as well as letting you know what is coming up!! 

Now do yourself a huge favor and visit these links to the other “Use Your Words” posts:

Baking In A Tornado

Southern Belle Charm

Not That Sarah Michelle

Spatulas on Parade

The Diary of an Alzheimer’s Caregiver

Dinosaur Superhero Mommy

On the Border

Confessions of a part time working mom

Never Ever Give Up Hope

Climaxed